October 29, 2015
By Phoebe Walsh, Illustrations: Sam Taylor.

Halloween article on Vice featuring New Horror and scary Dudes .

Article extract :

Summer is officially dead and buried and I’m dancing (so sexily) on its grave. Autumn is ideal because I can spend my Saturdays watching 18 episodes of Diners, Drive Ins and Dives without that ever-present fear of my mum shouting up the stairs, “It’s a beautiful day outside! Get out of bed!” Because it’s not a beautiful day and I can stay in bed. I can get Uber rides at a 1.8-inflated fare now, completely guilt free, because the sky looks a bit ominous. I can un-ironically drink Pumpkin Spice Lattes now. I don’t care. Autumn rules.
But there is one blotch on the foggy, autumnal horizon: Halloween, Halloween, Hallo-fucking-ween.
As a child, All Hallows’ Eve had you traipsing around in the freezing cold, awkwardly cold calling your weird neighbours just to get a few old sweets they found at the back of their cupboard. And that was when Halloween was good. This year you’ll inevitably find yourself at a shit Halloween party, stood on a sticky kitchen floor, in a ridiculous costume, beneath some glaring strip lights, trying not to eat a load of Haribo, while someone plays “The Time Warp” on repeat. Come through from your spectral realm, ghosts, and save us from this hell with a ritualistic slaughter.
Anyway, here is your comprehensive guide to everyone you’ll see at this year’s Halloween party:

TV COSTUME GUY
“I’m actually quite unique,” he’s saying through a Heisenberg goatee that keeps peeling off and getting in his snakebite. “I’m an ‘off the wall’ type of guy, you know? I got into left-wing politics a bit more this year. I love Frank Ocean’s music. I probably spend too much time on my phone – naughty! My favourite food is a burger and I’m on a mission to find the best one in town, but nothing’s going to top Byron, is it? Byron really is excellent. Sidenote: I think Breaking Bad is fucking great!”
Yeah, we all do, mate, because we’re all the same. You’re not different or special, because we’re all just exactly the same homogenous pieces of shit. You’ve essentially come in costume today as “every single 25-year-old dude’s bio on Tinder, all at once”.
There will be at least two guys dressed as Heisenberg this year, and they’ll bump into each other at 15 minute intervals throughout the night and shout: “I am not in danger, I am the danger!” at the tops of their voices, before conversation instantly dries up and they shuffle away to try to instigate games of beer pong. Do not say their name, no matter how much candy meth they offer you.

For the full Halloween Article check it out on Vice